10.31.2011

Some people...

I think I just need to vent my feelings...having all this anger inside is not healthy.

Last night I received the unexpected, I was verbally insulted and disrespected in such a way that I have never experienced in all of my entire life. And from someone who admitted and repeated that they don't know anything about me, yet continued to insult me as though they did know who I am.

I was insulted about who i am as person, what life aspirations I may or may not have, down to my physical apprearance which indicted the choices and preferences of my boyfriend.

I know who I had and what I'm not. I know what I look like and nor do I wish to be upheld by others people's standards of beauty, I hold my own beauty to my own standards. And last time I checked my boyfriend knows exactly what I look like and doesn't have a single problem with it so it shouldn't bother you. Nevermind that your not my type. My true friends and family knows who I am. They know my faults and virtues. They and I know that i am truly a kind, generous, heart warming, funny, smart and beautiful person. And besides only God can truly judge me weather its your belief or not.

Who gives anyone the right or the idea that they are entitled to make judgements on other people and hold them as fact.

What I've come to learn over the years is that people judge and insult out of hatred, jealousy, personal vindication and motives. All of which are ugly aspects of humanity. Worse part of it is when asked what was the reason or what tiggered the actions, the response was simply nothing.

If you have a problem with someone or something, it can be resolved in an adult manner, and not having to result to child like tactics to achieve what you want.

Even though I have said a mouthful, in trying to release some of this anger. I feel no different, nor better or worse. Words hurt, they are remembered. But everything that I have surpassed in my life, this too will become a distant memory and another obstacle that I have overcome.

Now you will never really get to know who I am, that's too bad.

Because I'm awesome.

10.27.2011

Never again...

will I ever think its ok to drink...a lot on a weekday. I tried everything in my power to not be hungover.
#1 I now realize that I can't recover from being drunk as quickly as when I was younger. However, I still thought that I could handle it. I wake up this morning praying for more sleep, walking sideways to the bathroom. Everytime I close my eyes, my head spins.

I try to convince myself that I will be better after a shower. I almost fell about 6 times during that 15 minutes.

I know I need aspirin fast, but I can't find them anywhere. All I could find were a bunch of sleeping pills. Honestly I gave up looking for them quickly, my head hurt too badly to keep searching. I figured someone at work has to have at least one.

No one did, but my coworker/partner in crime was nice enough to buy me some. Which really helped, even though I spent a majority of the morning feeling like crap. By the afternoon I felt zombie like.

Needless to say I will NEVER EVER AGAIN drink like that on a weekday except Friday. Guess I can add that to my Murtaugh List -- "I'm too old for this stuff."

Explained by the show "How I Met Your Mother"...sorry I don't have a clip.

10.26.2011

Stupid Dreams

So I was so concerned about the staff meeting that I kept waking up every couple of hours...So I wake up at 6:45am and I have be out the door by 7am. Great, 15 minutes to get ready.

Talk about a way to start the morning. I had every intention of having an early start but restless mind made a very sleepy me.

To tell you the truth I think part of the reason I find myself having a restless sleep is because Mr. P is not sleeping next to me. No we have not broken up, however he has been falling asleep on the couch...he's been really tired too.

I know it sounds cheesy. And I know at first I was really excited because I would have the bed to myself, but I constanly wake up in the middle of the night. And when he isn't so tired that he actually makes it to bed, I sleep just fine...

Does that happen to anyone else, do you get use to the person sleeping next to you...so much that you can't sleep when they are not there?

Or who knows, maybe its a ghost waking me up!

10.25.2011

Punch me in the face...

So I know that I have disappeared as usual but I've been either busy or tired. Sorry I'm only human...for now. Below I have listed a couple of reasons for my disappearance...yes I am defending myself.
1. My laptop is bye bye so I rely on boyfriend's laptop
2. His laptop got a virus so that kinda went out the door so I Imma try my phone
3. My phone then got stolen and then shut off for a little while
4. Super busy writing papers, reading endless chapters for school.
5. My boyfriend thinks I'm a full time maid and personal assistant.
6. I gotta fit my life somewhere in there!
7. With all this being said, I naturally get very tired. So a girls gotta take a rest sometime, right?

Needless to say I have been acupada. Please don't hate me. All I can is try. I have tons of ideas and pics to share but only of I had enough time. Hopefully once I get my laptop (when I can afford it!) I can get some blog entries a lot sooner than later.

Buenos its 1130ish pm and I have to wake up about 30ish minutes earlier than usual (stupid staff meetings!) So gotta go to sleep and I will talk to yas soon.