Love & Who Gets Over It Faster

So a couple of weeks ago I had two separate conversations that had me thinking....when ya break up, who gets over it faster, guys or girls? Of course every girl is probably thinking the same thing as I was, guys totally move on faster. After all we get so involve in a relationship it's like we sink ourselves into our partners. Guys...well you always seem like you don't care.

Well I was sitting down with Mr. P and he told me that he knows for a fact that if we ever went our separate ways that I would be the first person in the club trying to catch up on my missed game. (He didn't put in those words exactly, but you get the picture.) I of course disagreed, because well I love the man with every inch of my heart. AWWW...I know, corny, but I do. So we starting discussing how long we think it would take for us to recover if we did breakup (Knock on wood) Granted both of us could not fathom how long (smart choice!) but we agreed that it would probably be a while.

So one night I was out with a couple of friends, I don't really remember what we were talking about but either way one of guys said that "it takes us (guys) to get over a break up longer" So now I'm really thinking....could it be, do guys secretly take longer to get over a break up?

I know from experience that generally when you break up a girl is mostly crying, while a guy is mainly, again acting like they don't care. Mainly I believe that guys act like that because they feel they have to put up a macho act when in reality, maybe, some of them really are hurt and perhaps the best way they cope with the pain is to be an ass. Yeah, I said it.

Now I've had my share of relationships and when we finally do the last breakup with no possible chance of a makeup, it always seem that the guys were in relationships right after me.

Example #1 - My First (Puppy) Love
"R." He got married a year within our breakup

Example #2 - My Long Distance Relationship
"L." He refused to come see me (3 hours away) or really commit, however he meets someone online and almost instantly moves half way across the country and starts a family... also within the year.

Example #3 - My First Kiss Turned into Meeting Later in Our Lives
"E." This man had more drama than a soap opera (People it's not always good to start a relationship with problems) Either way a year or so after our breakup he sorta rekindled a relationship with his first love.

Yes, I acknowledge that I have a sort of "Good Luck Chuck" effect.  However if you notice they all moved on within the year. Meanwhile I waited a bit more time before moving on. *Another thing to consider is that I was never really 100% faithful in those relationships (and perhaps neither were they,) but that's not the reason we eventually broke up. I mean it didn't help but still they moved on sooner. Now I do have examples in which the girl moved on sooner.

Example #1 - My Parents
My mother still remains the apple of my father's eye, my mom not so much.

Example #2 - All the guys who I left in the "dust" while they still called for their 2nd or 3rd chance.

Example #3 - I don't really have one, but you can insert your own experience here.

Most of us will be able to recall more heartaches than more happily "rebounded" relationship experiences, it's the nature of the beast. So maybe it just has something to do with the person and the certain relationship you experienced. It could be a series of reasons as to who recovers sooner, but in the end does it really matter? Yes, it does hurt to see someone you possibly cared about rooming the streets with a new someone, however it doesn't change the fact that when it's over it's over, no matter who moves on faster.

Ultimately we all continue the search for our "soul mate". Hoping that one day we don't have to relieve those break up pains or even think about moving on. So who moves on sooner, women or men? We both experience pain on different levels and at different times. Ultimately we have to learn to appreciate when we have someone who really shows and acts like they care, instead of continuing to waste time, energy and effort on an impossible relationship.  Love is grand and oh so glorious, and it really thrives us to be better. It should ever be taken for granted or mistaken for the lust that we sometimes feel in those speed bumps. The people we choose to be in a relationship, reflect who we are, so lead with your heart wisely.

I've provided a link of epic loves, in where both partners could NOT live without each other. <3

http://amolife.com/reviews/top-20-most-famous-love-stories-in-history-and-literature.html

Sorry....

I've been gone, didn't realize it was a whole month. Just been a little caught up with a bit of personal issues, but I promise I have many blog entries to talk about, so please stay tuned.

My Search for Dessert

It all started when the ever ending craving for sweets (no I'm not pregnant, just a girl!) or maybe some commercialized subliminal messaging had some help in that. Anyway I suddenly had the urge for tiramisu, mind you I've only had this dessert once in my whole life, didn't really like it that much the first time around but for some odd reason I really wanted tiramisu. So me and Mr. P headed to the local Giant in search of my stomach's desire. Any time I head into any grocery store I wanna buy more that what I'm going in there for, damn you oh so delicious food!!!! But I headed straight to the bakery section, like a good girl. Lol! Of course I would be tempted by the oh so many goodies on display....

I mean really this one had a little bit of everything, come on! Plus it was only $3.99. Still I wiped off the drool from my mouth and continued on. Then I came into these little precious....

The pretty colors called my name, "Maria you know you want us" I could just taste the yummy yellow cake and chocolate and the frosted, but no! And if that wasn't enough of tantalizing enough....

these cookies caught my attention, with the shapes and all. How could I say no to a cookie, why would anyone said no to a cookie. It's never hurt anyone. But then I remembered what I really was looking for, so I continue for this endless quest of tiramisu. Finally at the end of store in the freezer section....after almost crying cause I had to say no to all those goodies, I found my....

TIRAMISU!!!!

So I checked out at the express lane with...other things. At home, only to see that I had to let the thing defrost for 3 hours!!!! If you could only see my face. So I waited and waited and finally I got a piece of the oh...so...not so good tiramisu. :( All that for me to be sadden with the taste of straight coffee powder. On the bright side Mr. P now likes coffee.

Last Names...

A certain incident had me really thinking about the importance of last names. We all have one with the exception of famous stage names like Madonna, Cher, Sharika even Beyonce, but us regular folks we'll keep em for now. My question is are last names all that important?

What brought this on is that me as always, meddling in other people's conversation (when will I ever learn to keep my opinion to myself? Probably never.) decided to give some insight to a question my sister had.

Yesterday my sister asked a couple of her friends if they think it would be a good idea to change my niece's last name from her father's to hers, her maiden name, since she pretty much did most of the "raising up". My niece's dad is by no means considered a "dead beat dad" but because of certain circumstances in his life he could not partake much of my niece's life.  Did I forget to mention, me and sister have different last names -- long story, different day.

While her friends were giving her their insights, I took it upon myself to invite myself into the conversation and offer my opinion. Which was...
"Remember we have different last names and because of that reason alone, I didn't forget what mom did or dad did for me/us. That did not play a factor into whom I love more, appreciate more or who did more for us."
At which point my sister decided to literally skip away and play with the kids and pretty much say that the discussion was over, making it quite obvious that my opinion made her feel uncomfortable or upset versus that of her friend's opinions.

So that had me thinking....am I wrong? Does a last name mean that much?

Granted I've been in several relationships and I have imagined having that desired one's last name, "oh how would it feel, how would it sound if my name were "Maria 'insert any of my ex-boyfriends last name here'". Even now that I am in a serious relationship, I still think about how nice it would feel to have his last name.

I know that last names must be semi important since in our society, there is that stigma of how some men want to have at least one son, so that he may carry on the family name. In the old days it was used as a way to imply where you came from or even what was your occupation.
Ex: Maria of El Salvador or Maria of these United States. or John the Blacksmith aka John Blacksmith

I suppose that since birth my last name has been different than that of my brother and sister I never felt as if I was any...different than them. They are still my siblings even though I have my mother's last name and they have my father's. I had the opportunity to take my father's name but ultimately decided that not only did I loved my last name but I knew that eventually, maybe I would end up changing it if I ever decided to marry. Plus I didn't want to offend my mom by changing it. (Talk about issues to discuss in therapy!) And changing my name of a total of 3 times didn't sound like too much fun.

Again I ask am I wrong? Is a last name that important?

Losing It...

So since this is my first official blog I’ve decided to call the following “losing it”. Ha! (Haven’t gotten to say that in a long time) If you don’t get it you don’t get it.

I have many reasons for starting a blog mainly b/c I’m trying to stay hip to the times…just kidding. That would be really dorky of me if I said that. Honestly the main reason will not be disclosed, the reason that will be disclosed is that I want to express and opinionate. You’ll agree or disagree with me, both of which I’m pretty sure I’ll appreciate. If I don’t, I’ll just delete your comment! Lol! I guess I’ll share the world from my point of view.

There will be a lot of random things/comments/posts on here, but that’s how I am, a little bit of everything.

I will tell you, if you love food, you’re in the right place. Cause I LOVE food!!!! Even though I personally have a love/hate type of relationship with food, I will try my best to blog about places I go to eat, so you can go out and eat!

So till later, check me out!