Men...

Men. How does the saying go, can't live with, can't live without em.

Yes, they can be frustrating, hard headed, stubborn, mean...the list can go on and on. But women also can be exactly the same way I just described the men. But men can also be strong, caring, romantic, thoughtful.

We, yes as women, have a tendency to bad mouth men. Almost has if we're groomed to do so. You know how it is....you get with your best gal pals and sure enough you all start talking about

"he did this and he did that", "omg", "I can't believe he did that"

And we forget to mention all the sweet moments. Yes, I agree there are some jerks in this world, trust me I have encountered some of them. But they are not all terrible or alike. Financially and emotionally we might not need men in our lives. Crap we might not need anyone, ever! However, biologically we still do need men, but that's a whole other story.
But trust me there are good, great, and wonderful men out there. --- It takes some time to find them, and sometimes they just walk into your life, but they are out there. We shouldn't always make rash generalizations about men and then put them all in the same catorgy. Remember if you have the power to change or have evolve as a person, so do some men. I admit I didn't have great or even just ok male figures in my life while I was growing up, but eventually I did.

My father stepped up to the plate 100% and showed me that you can always break free of cycles and fix your mistakes. And that ultimately you can learn to trust and love them.
My brother whom I had to be a second mother to is learning everyday from his mistakes (just like I do) and always tries to be better. Even though he still needs help from time to time but don't we all.
My boyfriend. I admit he is not perfect, neither am I. He is not the classic "fairytale" man, but he is MY "fairytale" come true. Sure we are not the ideal love birds, who are stuck at the hip. We don't always get along. But he inspires and challenges me in ways that I've always desired. And he is the first man that I've ever been with who when he says he loves me, I actually believe and know it to be true.

Men are not always easy to understand, but just because one man hurt you, caused you to mistrust, broke your heart...does not mean that all men will do that. At the end of the day we are all people, good and bad. Learn to see and cherish the true and real people who deserve your time, energy, and love.

Love & Who Gets Over It Faster

So a couple of weeks ago I had two separate conversations that had me thinking....when ya break up, who gets over it faster, guys or girls? Of course every girl is probably thinking the same thing as I was, guys totally move on faster. After all we get so involve in a relationship it's like we sink ourselves into our partners. Guys...well you always seem like you don't care.

Well I was sitting down with Mr. P and he told me that he knows for a fact that if we ever went our separate ways that I would be the first person in the club trying to catch up on my missed game. (He didn't put in those words exactly, but you get the picture.) I of course disagreed, because well I love the man with every inch of my heart. AWWW...I know, corny, but I do. So we starting discussing how long we think it would take for us to recover if we did breakup (Knock on wood) Granted both of us could not fathom how long (smart choice!) but we agreed that it would probably be a while.

So one night I was out with a couple of friends, I don't really remember what we were talking about but either way one of guys said that "it takes us (guys) to get over a break up longer" So now I'm really thinking....could it be, do guys secretly take longer to get over a break up?

I know from experience that generally when you break up a girl is mostly crying, while a guy is mainly, again acting like they don't care. Mainly I believe that guys act like that because they feel they have to put up a macho act when in reality, maybe, some of them really are hurt and perhaps the best way they cope with the pain is to be an ass. Yeah, I said it.

Now I've had my share of relationships and when we finally do the last breakup with no possible chance of a makeup, it always seem that the guys were in relationships right after me.

Example #1 - My First (Puppy) Love
"R." He got married a year within our breakup

Example #2 - My Long Distance Relationship
"L." He refused to come see me (3 hours away) or really commit, however he meets someone online and almost instantly moves half way across the country and starts a family... also within the year.

Example #3 - My First Kiss Turned into Meeting Later in Our Lives
"E." This man had more drama than a soap opera (People it's not always good to start a relationship with problems) Either way a year or so after our breakup he sorta rekindled a relationship with his first love.

Yes, I acknowledge that I have a sort of "Good Luck Chuck" effect.  However if you notice they all moved on within the year. Meanwhile I waited a bit more time before moving on. *Another thing to consider is that I was never really 100% faithful in those relationships (and perhaps neither were they,) but that's not the reason we eventually broke up. I mean it didn't help but still they moved on sooner. Now I do have examples in which the girl moved on sooner.

Example #1 - My Parents
My mother still remains the apple of my father's eye, my mom not so much.

Example #2 - All the guys who I left in the "dust" while they still called for their 2nd or 3rd chance.

Example #3 - I don't really have one, but you can insert your own experience here.

Most of us will be able to recall more heartaches than more happily "rebounded" relationship experiences, it's the nature of the beast. So maybe it just has something to do with the person and the certain relationship you experienced. It could be a series of reasons as to who recovers sooner, but in the end does it really matter? Yes, it does hurt to see someone you possibly cared about rooming the streets with a new someone, however it doesn't change the fact that when it's over it's over, no matter who moves on faster.

Ultimately we all continue the search for our "soul mate". Hoping that one day we don't have to relieve those break up pains or even think about moving on. So who moves on sooner, women or men? We both experience pain on different levels and at different times. Ultimately we have to learn to appreciate when we have someone who really shows and acts like they care, instead of continuing to waste time, energy and effort on an impossible relationship.  Love is grand and oh so glorious, and it really thrives us to be better. It should ever be taken for granted or mistaken for the lust that we sometimes feel in those speed bumps. The people we choose to be in a relationship, reflect who we are, so lead with your heart wisely.

I've provided a link of epic loves, in where both partners could NOT live without each other. <3

http://amolife.com/reviews/top-20-most-famous-love-stories-in-history-and-literature.html