Because Sometimes You Get Tired of Being Mad.

So as the summer days start to count down into the crisp, beautiful autumn days, I reflect.

I've taken these days and just relaxed, although I must admit that can be somewhat difficult for me. I can be a bit of an overachiever, more like take a pile of a bunch of things on one plate and watch me explode! So I've tried doing the complete opposite of that and enjoyed the long dog summer days and relax. Several days were spent doing nothing but watching seasons of many shows on Netflix or Hulu, reading, cooking, and everything in between. And I must admit it's been really nice.

And as I reflect on my peaceful moments after so many months of tension and angry, I've decided that I'm tired of being mad.

Without going into too many details there's been a lot of things and people I ultimately x out of my life. Several of the incidents were a result of not wanting unnecessary drama or negative energy in my life.  And if I'm being honest other situations were a result of me being angry, bitter and trying to be right.

I've realized that I don't want to be right all the time. I don't want to hold on to grudges. I don't want to be angry anymore. And in attempt to get rid of negative energy, I've harboring it within myself. And that does me no good. Of course all things take time and you have to let it pass before you're willing to let go. And I think I've come to that step. I've committed wrongs as well as experienced them, but today I am willing to let it go. Its time. I will let go of things that no longer hold a place in my heart or soul; letting go of that baggage. I will let of harboring that negativity, that anger - that holds me back from progressing with my life.

It will start with this and simple hellos. I will open my heart and soul to all the good that this world and life has to offer me.

Lent...

Although I was raised Catholic, as an adult I really haven't practiced much of my Catholic roots. As I grew up I started to develop my own thoughts on religion as a whole. Don't get me wrong, I still believe that prayer is a wonderful type of mediation. And I admire people who have a strong sense of faith in their own religions. But I also believe the people have the right to choose their beliefs or lack there of.

So getting to the point. Me and my boss were talking about Lent and she let me know that she was giving up all meat products. Not just meat, but anything that comes from an animal!!! Burgers, steaks, chicken, milk, eggs, major vegan! Let's just say I don't think....no I know I wouldn't be able to do that.

But I got to thinking, what would I give up for 40 days. I've never really practiced Lent because
A. I didn't know what to give up
B. I would always forget when Lent was
C. I lack the will power and concentration to remember that I have given up anything.

So this time I decide why not give this a shot, just for the hell of it. Gosh, I just said hell. I'm so simple sometimes. So here I am trying to figure out what I can give up for 40 days that is going to be challenging, but also reasonable. I know a lot of people give up meat, but I don't want to do that. Some people give up the Internet or the use of social media outlets, this isn't reasonable for me, since I use for my job, and I'm also addicted to it.

I finally figured it out and I am kinda mad at myself for even thinking of this. But indeed this will be a challenge.

No bread for 40 days.

So for some of y'all, this may be nothing. But to me, bread is well...the bread of my life. I eat bread just about everyday. I always said if I opened my own business, other than a florist shop, I would open a sandwich shop.

I mean think of the possibilities. Tuna sandwich, meatball sandwich, ham & cheese sandwich, tomato & onion sandwich, BLT, hot dog sandwich, grilled cheese. The list goes on and on. And I've eaten all of these sandwiches, but now I must not have them with the bread part, at least for the next 40ish days.

Needless to say this is going to be a challenge for me(did I say that already?) but I hope to get some insight to my eating habits, lose some lbs, and hopefully prove to myself that I can live without something that I love so much(for 40 days anyways)

A Day In The Life of a Struggling "Adult" College Student

101.3
So I finally got to turn in my first official essay. I must say I am really excited to see what grade I get. Of course I will be a little disappointed if I get anything less than what I expect. I would love to get an 'A' but I have to be realistic so I hope to get at least a low 'B'. I worked really hard on and I would like to see that it wasn't in vain. The assignment was to write a comparsion & contrast essay on pretty much any subject we liked, but particularly something personal. So I choose to write about my process of cooking Thanksgiving versus how my former sister in law (that's a different story for a different day) cooks her Christmas dinner. I titled it "The Recipe". Well I'll definitely let you know how I did. Now for today's class, today was honestly was my first day that I didn't want to go to class. I just didn't really feel like it. No real reason, just didn't feel like it.
Ultimately I'm glad that I did, the professor is pretty laid back so that helps. Plus today was a short day since he wasn't feel that great. Nothing special about the class, we just got to talk about all the essays we're reading and examine them. It's pretty neat to have a story broken apart and explained by someone else, to see things I may have not seen. Today just made me feel like I made the right decision, not because I need a degree to better my live. But because it feels good...fore filling. Like I'm using my brain for something more than day to day mundane activities. I like being mentally challenged, charging my brain.
It's like a good song...you feel it. You understand it, live it, become almost one with it. And the feeling it leaves you with...like you're ok, that you'll be ok, that someone out there understands you or even makes you think of things you may have never thought of. I guess ultimately that's what you're suppose to get of class, I mean learning. You learn to understand, to see things in other ways and apply it to the world.
In conclusion it was a good simple class, can't wait till next week.